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We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

ALL MY OPPS SHOULD WEAR CONDOMS

by Smoothie Lou

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  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    Purchasable with gift card

      $10 CAD  or more

     

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SUPER/POWERS 02:09
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BRODIES 01:57
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HM-02 03:28

about

Why Is The Album Only On Bandcamp?

I am trying to break new ground. Level Up, if you will. I want you to hear the album I want everyone to hear the album. But that means I have to do things differently this time.


Who Is Smoothie Lou:

I am a musician. I rap. I make beats. I make things sound good. I’ve been making music for almost 5 years, which started when I enrolled at Metalworks Institute. Since then I have released 127 song publicly, spanning 11 bodies of work but this is the first time I’ve considered my project an “Album.”


Last year, I embarked on an effort to release a song every week in hopes to create traction, but within 8 months I didn’t seen the growth or the return on this investment of effort. This made me not only financially burnt out but also mentally.


Regardless I am still just as dedicated to my craft, continuing my journey and I believe this album will be a turning point in my career.




Why I Need You Guys:

To fund the initial phase of my operation, I had to use all of my personal income. I also streaming platforms payout next to nothing, so I've made no profits off of this endeavour to this point. In fact, I'm running this whole operation at a pretty substantial deficit.


And to maintain complete creative control, I REALLY want to avoiding aligning myself with a company (ie a record label) that would restrict me, both creatively and financially. Once someone else is calling the shots, it can really inhibit the artist. In looking at my work, you'll see it isn't necessarily "corporate-friendly" content.


I want to speak my truth and be able to create whatever the fuck I want. And that’s why I need you.



What are you funding?

In a nutshell, you are funding phase two of my music career.

You are letting me tell my story.

That includes the following:

Public Release Of The Album
Music Videos (for songs off of that album)
Promotional Material
Shows


These things cost money.

Public Release Of The Album: Right now you can listen to the album by purchasing it on Bandcamp, for 10$ minimum (meaning you can pay/donate MORE but Bandcamp is going to take “10-15%”) While we could just upload to Soundcloud to free this is my first official rap album and I wanna go big… Trojan size.

Music videos: These will unquestionably be the biggest costs. I would like to make some videos that do the songs justice. To do that properly, it's going to require some serious resources.


The more money I get, the more videos I can make, and the CRAZIER these videos can become. We live in North America, people. So with ample funding, there's really nothing that can't be bought. What do you guys want to see? I'll make it happen.


From special effects, to models, to props, to extras, to locations, to condoms, these videos can add up. And to do them the right way, financial flexibility is essential.


Trust me, I'll make my next round of videos unforgettable if I can get the funding to do so.


Promotional Materials: We want ads all over the city. We want promotional condoms in every washroom. We want t-shirts, crop tops, long johns, sweaters & underwear. We want to take the merch to it’s highest level. Far beyond a “lousy t-shirt”


But for now you can also support this campaign and receive a “I helped smoothie make his album and all I got was this Lousy t-shirt” by choosing “35$” when you purchase the album.



Shows: Once the album drops, I'd love the opportunity to perform live and share this music with my fans in person. There are tons of hard costs associated with putting on a show, such as hiring a crew, transportation costs, a DJ, stage equipment, etc.



Obviously, there is a baseline total it would cost to create a simple show. However, the more funding I get, the more interesting these shows can become.



I don't want my shows to just be a guy on stage rapping. They can be way more than that. But to make things cooler, they require resources, bodies, props, stunts, etc. So the more I get, the more freedom I'll have creatively to develop the perfect show.



I also want to do something groundbreaking at Supercrawl whether I’m on the stage or not.



The Rewards

I tried to provide some incentivizing rewards in return for your help. Look to the right, and you can see the options.


The Bandcamp purchase is the only place to currently hear the new album.



Contact me personally and the rewards get even better the more you donate.



Everybody wins here. If you donate, you'll get to hear something hot and fresh. I'll be getting funding.



And together, we can rise to the top of Hip Hop. Think about how much Smoothie we'll have once we arrive. An unprecedented amount of Smoothie is at stake here, people. Cheers, enjoy the album and make sure to wear a condom.



The album WILL be publicly released. Videos WILL be made. Shows WILL happen.



It's NOT if, it's when. But the only thing in my way is funding. And that's what this campaign is for.



I LOVE YOU ALL. HELP ME GET THERE. I'LL TAKE YOU WITH ME.



WE MIGHT JUST CHANGE THE WORLD. SMOOTHIE GANG.

credits

released June 18, 2023

executive produced by Garry Swisherman
recorded, mixed and mastered by Smoothie Lou
recorded at Smoothie Gang Studios

license

all rights reserved

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about

Smoothie Lou Hamilton, Ontario

INDIE HIPHOP ARTIST FROM HAMILTON, ONTARIO, CANADA

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